"i love to learn" or "i'm still bitter about that D I got eight years ago"

Btw, I love to take classes at our local community college and have been blessed to get to take them because my mom foots the bill (thanks again, Mom!) 

I signed up for Econ 201 - Macroeconomics this semester. I was nervous. Maybe I'd gone too far this time I thought to myself while looking over the text for the class. WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I HAVE THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?!?!

I've been told I have a rather "different approach to education" by one of my professors who was a mentor during my English pursuits years ago, and I decided to take it as a compliment. My college career has been what I like to call eclectic. Classes I picked because they sounded fun to take, that may or may not have applied to any degree I was perusing, include Finger Spelling, News Writing, Survey of World Mythology, Introduction to Allied Health...

I've enjoyed nearly every one of my classes, with a few exceptions like an Intermediate Aerobics class (back when I was so sleep deprived I thought that yes, I could get up at 5AM after waitressing until 2AM and still be coordinated enough not to knock someone else out in class two days a week). A rather fortuitous bout of bronchitis got me out of that class without too much guilt!

Another class that still really gets me riled up is the only class ever that I received a D in (I'm considering taking a break to throw up and come back, since I'm admitting a D out here... on the INTERNET, but I'm going to post it AND I'm not going to loose my lunch over it, AND it won't result in a 'ghost post'!) Any way, the class was "Computer Operating Systems" which I took the Spring semester just after the big Windows XP release. Given the course title and description in the college catalog, I was under the impression that we'd be learning the highlights and inner workings of some of the major operating systems (OS). Boy, was I ever wrong! It turned out the course was two lectures on the fact that there were OS (primarily focusing on DOS/Windows . . . someone else bringing up the idea of Unix was quickly stopped - that's not what this class is about.) Then we were on to the real agenda of the class: an in depth look into what I now know would be my personal pit of despair, WINDOWS 2000. 

I'm going to give you a brief list of my excuses of why I didn't do well in that particular class:

• the course title and description were a complete LIE! 
• Windows 2000 was an outdated OS at that point, and though I can see why it was handy for a college or businesses to use for their huge networks for a long time after that . . . that's NOT what the course description said the class was about!
• average amount of sleep I was getting per night was 3 hours. Often just stayed up since it wasn't worth risking sleeping through work over 3 hours of sleep. . .  
• the floppy disk that I turned in the final project on died (as they notoriously do) so all my teacher got was an error when he tried to access the project and he couldn't accept a late redo of the final at that point
• the love of my life then lived just under 2,000 miles away and so I chose to distract myself with too many commitments. (next time I'll just sleep more, really.)

Realistically, going to college full time along with working 70 - 80 hours a week was one of the more ridiculous things I've done. That's right, along with racking up a bunch of credit card debt at the same time, it's on my top three "young and dumb" things to do. I ended up blaming everything on that ridiculous class, which in my self-caused sleep deprived state, was perfectly logical, and rather than try to make some effort or change classes, I stayed, out of "principle" and got a D.


The dread I feel when someone mentions Windows 2000, or when I have horrifying flash backs to that class, is what struck fear in my heart (or maybe just my stomach) after I started looking over the daunting text I have for Macroeconomics. Vowing not to have a repeat of the notorious OS class, and logistically unable to switch classes, I went to the first class last Monday night. Guess what. This class is going to be cake. It comes down to four tests, none using unreliable floppy diskettes. It helps too, that I now an only slightly sleep deprived full time mom.

Here's my point, which I don't think I really made yet: learning, even when the task itself was an abysmal failure, can be worth it. And while I'm not trying to attribute my D to my mom, or the fact that I was home schooled, I do mean to say, thank you Mom and Dad. I still love to learn, enjoy an academic challenge,  and can't imagine life without all the books and sometimes, learning the hard way.

A moment of reminiscing allows for apprecition of previously unnoted goodness

Dear Professor,

I've been thinking of you, the classes and projects. Thank you for pointing out that a research paper is not the proper context for making up words. Also pointing out that that the average college student can't claim they "coined" a new word was a good thing. Thank goodness for the bloggosphere allowing the decimation of the English language and all the rules that we learned were only acceptable to break in certain ways back in the day. I will always remember that "a lot" is yes, shockingly, TWO WORDS.

I appreciate all the times when you put up with the opinions and vocalizations of people who hadn't lived long enough to experience the ramifications of their opinions with graciousness. You could have belittled, shot down or coldly dismissed. You were frank, you were blunt, you were thought provoking, but never cold hearted and superior.

You have my sympathy, that the campus is now "fresh air" only and you are presumably walking half a mile off campus for a little break from the insanity that is a place of learning. Remember the good old days when one could have an officemate puffing away at a big, fat, cheap cigar while you are trying to concentrate on your papers? Ahh the good old days. That is what started this little note of appreciation to you, it was an afternoon for reminiscing. Continue in all your eccentric goodness, live long, and prosper.

Sincerly,
Desilou Freebush

Social Bonds

I read "The No Name Woman" again. My mind finds it so strange to read about the cultures ans social rules of other countries. I find myself angered at people acting in their social rule set and the anger covers from my eyes the fact that I am putting our rules over theirs to try to conform them or say why they were right or wrong. Where are my ancestors' ghosts? What are the rules I am supposed to go by? I must be so steeped in these social bonds that I cannot see them any longer. Yet I know they are there - I can almost feel them around me - like demons.

god games

What is it about those crazy little "god games" that is so addicting? Games like SIMS, Age of Empires, FarmVille, Farm Town... OY! There are a ton of these crazy games where a person can build a city/hometown/farm etc and then try to make it "successful". What's the point? There is no way to win the game. One never saves the princess or a planet. Usually one gets so immerced in the game that the gravity well created by the game quickly pulls in friends as well. My guess is that the government is using these games to send people subliminal messages and has incorporated some urgent need to return to the game or play through lunch/dinner/bedtime so that they can make sure we get the full force of their brain washing. In fact, the government is playing their own little god game! Huh. I can't ... remember where I ... going with this... Oh! My potatoes need to be harvested on my little virtual farm. Gotta go!

Let's Get Out Our Toning Bands -or- How I Enjoyed My Breakfast Even More

This morning I was watching the Today Show on NBC. Since I hadn't had breakfast yet and it is supposed to be the most important meal of the day, I fixed something easy to eat during a commercial break. WELL. I should have gotten out my toning bands because as I ate my giant double chocolate chip Costco muffin which I had just heated and melted REAL BUTTER on top, the Today Show aired a segment about back fat. Al even cracked a joke about eating to much fat back (bacon). I didn't realize I needed to be so concerned about back fat. Apparently it is the sneaky thing that causes all health problems, along with bras and t-shirts not to fit. If you do the magic exercises twice a day for two to three weeks the fat will magically melt away. HMMMM. I know I'm a bit over weight, but I've only recently been uncomfortable with it - in an achy physical way, not the OMG SHE IS FAT social pressure way. Our society is so concerned with being thin and with the economy and yet keeping up with the proverbial Jones' - I'm thinking these all are symptoms of the really disease: asophrosyne - the lack of self control. (I got a B in Ancient Greek, however, it really seems we are missing sophrosyne... I decided that adding the "a" for lacking was the best way to go about this. I feel in better shape and more educated now that I wrote that and all thanks to a segment about back fat). Here we are, over weight, in debt up to our eyeballs watching television about what we need to buy to have the best picnic/social standing/success in life. I wonder if that is how my double chocolate ginormous muffin became so especially delicious. :)

Sophrosyne (σωφροσύνη)

a Greek philosophical term

e t y m o l o g i c a l l y

meaning moral sanity and

from there self control

or moderation guided by

true self-knowledge.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sophrosyne